Group Therapy for Gay Men
WHAT CAN YOU WORK ON BY JOINING A GAY MEN’S THERAPY GROUP?
Trouble with isolating, making friends and /or feeling like you don’t fully fit in with other gay men or groups of gay men
Difficulty opening up, handling conflict or asserting yourself with friends, dates / partners, family members or work colleagues
Get feedback about how you come across to other gay men
Finding yourself dating guys who are a bad match for you
Stuck in a relationship that’s not going well, but you feel confused or paralyzed about what to do
Dealing with such difficult transitions such as leaving a relationship, coming out, aging in the gay community or adjusting to a new job or city
Learning how to connect with gay men in healthy ways after transitioning from out-of-control behaviors with drugs, alcohol and/or sex
Allowing your fears of rejection to stop you from moving forward
Trouble coping with feelings of anxiety and depression
Getting help to overcome childhood peer rejection or family trauma
Many gay men grew up hiding and learned to not reveal a part of themselves (such as being gay). These experiences taught you that it wasn’t safe to open up and be yourself. This gay men’s group is process oriented which means it focuses on helping members practice relating to other gay men on a weekly basis. Over time you will learn how your particular relational styles can create increased intimacy or distance with other members which can be invaluable feedback.
Some people find group therapy to be like joining a healthy family. One that supports and challenges you to grow by opening up and being vulnerable
The group can help you to learn more about yourself when other members trigger old childhood issues or remind you of your interactions and experiences with friends, family members, partners or co-workers. And, to learn what role you may be playing when there are problems in these relationships.
Group therapy can also help you to express opinions and difficult feelings such as anger. When conflicts develop, as they do in any family, there is an opportunity to learn how to respond differently and work through these problems in a constructive way.
Group members can also challenge any self-defeating behaviors you may be struggling with. And, the group process can shed light on how you minimize similarities with other members and focus on perceived differences which further feelings of isolation
If you want to make some changes, group is a safe place to practice new ways of expressing and thinking about yourself. In addition, group members help each other to work through worries, disappointments, loneliness as well as a variety of concerns including:
meeting and dating appropriate men
combining sex and intimacy
HIV and other STI’s
building a satisfying social network
quieting the harsh inner critic and working through fears of rejection
coping with conflict and challenges in relationships
coming out
sexual compulsiveness
career challenges and changes
HOW LONG DOES GROUP THERAPY LAST?
While group therapy is not designed to be indefinite, it can take a significant commitment of time from you to really benefit from the intimate feedback you will receive.
When you join the group, everyone has to play catch up to try and get to know you, which can only happen as you reveal yourself over time. Just like any new situation, it takes a good couple of months to become familiar with your surroundings. Group can also be an invaluable companion to individual therapy.
WHAT IF I HAVE ANOTHER THERAPIST OR IF I AM NOT READY FOR A GROUP?
If someone is working with another individual therapist, it can be helpful to work collaboratively with a member’s therapist. And, if group therapy does not feel right for you at this time, but you want to talk about some of the problems outlined here, I am available for individual and couple’s sessions.