If you grew up in challenging circumstances, you may have found it difficult to tolerate uncomfortable emotions, especially if they felt uncontrollable. You may have learned to not trust others or there was no one to go to for comfort. This can begin the search for something to trust and rely upon to escape and relieve the discomfort that you feel may never end. Alcohol, drugs, sex, food, gambling, etc. often promise this relief, at least on a temporary basis; but, the promise of this relationship can lead one down the road to a "pathological relationship" with these substances / behaviors.

An irony of addiction is that the Addict always affects those around them. It has a different feel and look for each affected person, related to the context of their connection with the Addict. This complementary component to the system is known as the Co-Addict. They could be the Addict’s partner, brother, sister, mother, father, child, friend or co-worker. What all these people have in common is they are in some form of relationship with the Addict. The partner of a Sex Addict is often referred to as a Co-Sex Addict, or COSA.